Swimming With the River

Fall Update

2010-10-28T16:59:00.004-05:00

I'm not much of a writer. I can hardly keep up with the things that need doing around the house. We are doing well. We are moved into the new, old house and are still unpacking and getting rid of a lot of stuff. It is so liberating to remove things from your life.

Aiden grows big and stronger each day. I am so proud of him. Emma is walking. She is also a climber. She is a great communicator. It is amazing how much one can communicate by knowing how to point. She is talking constantly. I don't understand everything that she is saying, but I know it has meaning. I do understand Daddy, cat, Bella, dog, bird, cracker, book. I think she will be an early reader like her big brother. She doesn't have much interest in her toys, but she will flip the pages of every book, catalog, and magazine she can grab.

Here are some pictures of the kids.

Final Adoption Hearing

2010-06-15T19:54:00.003-05:00

We had our final adoption hearing yesterday in Jacksonville. It was quite an informal process, and we are nonetheless glad we made the trip. The judge was very kind, and gave Emma a little stuffed toy that Emma loves. Our son, Aiden, acted as judge and banged the gavel to make it official. He even wore the judge robes at the desk.

This ends our four and a half year adoption journey, although the journey of our family of four continues.

I'm Just Not Ready For It

2010-05-07T19:56:00.002-05:00

I'm just not ready for this. How does a mother know to wake up because she needs to wake up? That happened to me two weeks ago. I looked over at Emma's crib, and she was staring at me....from over the crib. Yes, she was standing up, and started laughing when I opened my eyes and saw her. Yikes, where did that come from? She wasn't even eight months old yet, and I never saw it coming. Now she is standing everywhere. Her feet have flattened out over the last couple weeks, and she can walk forward if her arms/hands are held. She doesn't even have a tooth yet! This is just too soon for me.

Just Another Day

2010-04-18T11:17:00.006-05:00

Things are not too exciting lately. The weather is warming up here in Florida, and I finally broke down and turn the air conditioner on in the late afternoon. Our temporary apartment faces west, and we have no air flow. We are just waiting for the electrician to finish the rewiring on the house before we move in. We will clean first, but paint after we move.

Aiden is absorbed in the series, "Liberty's Kids". It is a cartoon series on the America Revolution. He is learning more than I ever learned the traditional way (and I'm learning too!). I hope they show this good stuff in school.

He is also taking off in math. I though we would never finish addition, and he is zooming past subtraction and working on multiplication. We will try a new math program, "MEP", or Mathematic Enhancement Program.

For grammar we tried First Language Lessons, by Susan Wise, but he said it was repetitive and boring. I'm going to try MCT, Michael Clay Thompson's language arts program. If that doesn't work now, we will just wait another six months. His academics abilities are greater than his desire and a willingness to sit still, so waiting another six months isn't a problem. We started Sequential Spelling, and I love it. Aiden does very well with it, but the writing is too much at one time. I think we will work on spelling the dolch sight words this summer, and try Sequential Spelling again in fall. History Odyssey will continue over the summer, and we will continue with our free-form science. Since Aiden has a gift with language, I picked up some beginner French material we will try.

Aiden made some stilts a week ago. He spent the afternoon with a good friend, who has as many tools as my husband. Aiden loved building them himself.

Emma is growing, but not quickly. She isn't going to be a big girl. Her birthmother wasn't tall either. She is doing well developmentally. She is doing a modified crawl, where she uses her arms to propel herself forward and pushes with her back legs. She claps, and waves, and loves getting lots of attention from strangers. She is very attracted to books and magazines, so I give her some heavy paper brochures to mess up. She also loves going after the cat. Babies are not new to Bella, the cat. Aiden used to go after Bella too, so Bella is having nothing to do with Emma.

Easter 2010

2010-04-10T16:38:00.006-05:00

We don't make holidays a big celebration. We try to keep things simple, and enjoy the day. We didn't race to the photo centers for fancy pictures, and we didn't participate in the community egg gatherings.

Instead, we dyed eggs with onions skins the Saturday before Easter. The bunny hid eggs with quarters in them around the house, and left a small basket of healthier treats. Emma received a stuffed chick in a shell, and a few dollars from Grandma. We enjoyed the rest of the day together.

I'm glad a few eggs scattered around the house is enough to create excitement for the preceding two weeks. There is joy in simplicity.

We Are Moving

2010-03-05T20:35:00.002-05:00

We ended up purchasing a bigger house. Did I write about this before? Anyway, that is where we have focused a lot of our attention (and money, my goodness). Emma will need her own bedroom one day, and kids need room to move around. This house comes with an empty lot, so they will have plenty of room to run.

I have been scraping rotten carpet padding (from original bright, red shag carpeting no less) in the dining room. Emma is two feet away from me in her Pack N Play, but I can only get about an hour of work done (which includes a brief nap for Emma). She is all of six months old now, so her separation anxiety has kicked in. I know that is a good thing, but it doesn't allow me to be much help. Drew has done some removal of kitchen weirdness, and is now replacing a floor joist (2 x 4) that is holding up a water heater on the back porch. We already can't agree on a future floorplan for the kitchen. The rest of the house needs a serious cleaning, and paint.

Emma is rolling around now to get wherever she wants to be. She is quite proficient at rolling. She eats egg yolk, banana, avocado. She isn't too fond of liver (can you blame her?). She adores her big brother, and laughs at all his silliness. This just makes him act even sillier. Emma still sleeps through the night. She has developed eczema due to the cold, dry weather. It should go away when our Florida humidity returns.

Aiden lost one of his upper front teeth. It was wiggly anyway, and he climbed up on the counter in the kitchen to get something out of an upper cabinet. Anyway, he lost his footing, and came down on his chin on the countertop. A couple of bites into his dinner, his tooth of out. The tooth fairy was very generous because she didn't have any change that evening.

No Sympathy for the Weary (Emma update too)

2010-01-12T17:28:00.006-05:00

Conethia doesn't want to hear my daily woes (smile), so I'll just move on to talking about Emma.

We are most fortunate to have a baby that sleeps through the night. She is now 4.5 months old. She doesn't take a long nap during the day, but does cat nap. I think this helps for sleeping through the night, although it doesn't give me much of a break during the day for schooling.

Emma is a really easy baby though. When she is tired she throws her arms up and arches her back. She smiles a lot, and has a very pleasant disposition. She is teething, but doesn't cry about it. She makes cute raspberries. She does this crazy monkey yell when she wants your attention. It sounds like, "eh, eh, eh, eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhh". Stupid to write that, I know. She loves watching her uber energetic brother bounce off the walls and ceiling. Emma is also very alert. Aiden has been a good helper, and he hasn't had anything near the amount of sibling jealousy I expected.

We think her birthmother did a really fantastic job the first three months, and have a great deal of respect and admiration for her.

Going Crazy

2010-01-08T17:30:00.002-05:00

I have a very active and demanding 6.5 year old, and now a 4 month old. I homeschool our very smart boy. I work with our contractor on remodeling our house so that we can put it up for sale, and try to keep up our temporary apartment in some order. I am trying to find us a larger home now that we have a girl. I still have our holiday decorations up, and the laundry could be folded. The cat is almost out of food, and my mother needs me to run some errands for her. Oh, I am also going crazy.

Republishing Old Posts from Ukraine

2010-01-03T21:33:00.002-05:00

When we signed on with an agency to adopt from Kyrgyzstan, we edited our blog and removed several posts about our unsuccessful Ukrainian adoption attempt. It feels great not to have to jump through any hoops set up by international adoption agencies. Our entire Ukrainian experience is here now for anyone that wants to know what can happen.

We Have Our Girl!

2009-12-15T10:48:00.002-05:00

We brought our baby girl home this month! She was adopted domestically, and we couldn't be happier. We didn't want to post anything earlier about throwing our hat into the domestic adoption arena because we would have also gone to Krygyzstan if it had reopened. Anyway, everything finds its balance sooner or later.

She is happy, healthy, and no exposure to drugs or alcohol. We are thrilled, and she couldn't be more perfect.

Hibernating at Home

2009-07-29T19:33:00.003-05:00

There is nothing much to report on the adoption front.

It is hot hot hot outside, and we are staying inside and trying to stay cool. I've been doing some sewing lately. I just finished a baby quilt, and a crown. I have a pattern for some cute girl's dresses, but I don't know the sex of the child we may adopt one day.

Update, But Nothing Exciting

2009-07-09T19:20:00.002-05:00

We are considering some other options right now. I've read that things might begin moving in Kyrgyzstan before the end of the year. That may or may not include families without referrals. Anyway, that isn't what we are checking out. But we aren't just sitting around waiting.

UPDATE: Kyrgyzstan

2009-05-06T16:45:00.000-05:00

This from JCICS:

It is Joint Council's understanding from discussions with the U.S. Dept of State, Office of Children's Issues that a number of arrests have been made in Kyrgyzstan in connection to intercountry adoptions. It is also our understanding that key Kyrgyz officials have confirmed the arrests of at least one adoption coordinator. Joint Council is currently working to confirm the arrests of at least two other coordinators. The latest information indicates that some of the illegal activity under investigation involve intercountry adoptions for children matched with U.S. citizen adoptive parents, including the creation of fraudulent paperwork for the purposes of intercountry adoption. Joint Council is currently working to confirm the charges and the extent of investigations. It is unknown at this time how this will affect the 65 pending cases.

In response to the current developments in Kyrgyzstan Joint Council is currently advocating with the U.S. Dept of State, Office of Children's Issues for a conference call for families who are matched with a referral. Given the limited schedule of the U.S. Embassy in Kyrgyzstan this week we do not anticipate this call occurring until late in the week of May 11th or during the week of May 18th.

Further, Joint Council has at this time decided it is necessary to suspend the current campaign of waiting child stories and the U.S. congressional campaign until further information is available on the investigations, charges, arrests and extent of illegal activities. At this time we respectfully request that prospective adoptive parents with referrals not take drastic advocacy measures for their case or the 65 pending cases. In conversations with government officials it is apparent that aggressive advocacy efforts at this time may simply be counterproductive. In order to ensure that advocacy efforts are strategic and directed at the appropriate officials and within an effective context, it is necessary to see how the investigations are resolved in Kyrgyzstan. Joint Council is greatly saddened by these recent events and offers our continued support to all families. We will continue to advocate for the children of Kyrgyzstan and the processing of legal, ethical intercountry adoptions from Kyrgyzstan with the strongest of commitments. Joint Council will also continue to update Member Organizations, adoptive families and all key stakeholders as the situation develops.

Thank you for your continued support of Joint Council and the children we all serve.

One of Many Updates....Sort of

2009-05-03T16:41:00.002-05:00

This is an edit of a post from an agency very active in Kyrgyzstan. They are kind enough to keep people updated on what is happening (or at least what they know).

The Parliament did not discuss adoption this week. Next week is holidays, so if they meet they may not discuss adoption. The following week they are back on schedule and we expect they will issue their decision. The MOE is clearly operating with the belief that they will give a green light to completing adoptions in process; they indicate that it will take about a month to catch up with the matched waiting families. We do not know if they will then continue to make referrals to other families, or if the Embassy will accept new dossiers, or what. Hopefuly all of the above. The investigations continue. Most in-country coordinators have been called in for questioning. A couple judges have been unseated. They continue to raise those bizarre questions about "Why do foreign families want Kyrgyz orphans?" We've heard that family stories and photos have been helpful at debunking myths and allaying fears. The US Embassy is actively engaging the Kyrgyz officials to resolve the impasse. I don't know how many more times I can bear saying "one more week" or you can bear hearing it, but we are still stuck.

Killing Some Time, Burning Some Money

2009-03-19T15:56:00.004-05:00

Aiden and I spent a couple days at Disney World this week. It was nice to get out of town with another mom and Aiden's best buddy. I asked Aiden what he liked best about the trip. He said it was riding the monorail, jumping on the bed in the hotel room, and the Legos store. I didn't have to purchase park admission passes for that. But then, knowing he isn't a big fan of too many people and too much noise (I liked lounging around the hotel pool the best), I could have guessed that.

We may go back again when the crowd is thinner. Then again, we can head west for 15 minutes and get a hotel room on the beach (with good beds to jump on), ride the beach trolley, and float in the Gulf of Mexico for less than the cost of a park pass to the Magic Kingdom.

Latest Update on Kyrgyzstan Progress

2009-03-15T19:52:00.002-05:00

Based on an email from a wonderful agency director:

The powers that be say they are working on it, but there is nothing of substance yet to report. The investigations seem to center on Bishkek, although the adoption documents from Tokmok may not have been reviewed yet.

According to The Economist, The Kyrgyz president gave the US six months to renegotiate the US base arrangement. While it does not affect adoption directly, any swing between Russia and the US from inside Kyrgyzan can influence how the Kyrgyz government feels about the US in general.

DOS has not directly reported anything new, but the talk is that they are working hard to get children home. It isn't known whether they can make it happen this month or not.

JCICS Update

2009-03-05T18:23:00.000-05:00

March 3, 2009 - Joint Council is pleased to confirm that U.S. Embassy officials in Kyrgyzstan met late last week with the Vice Prime Ministers Office regarding the 65 in-process intercountry adoption cases and the future of intercountry adoptions from Kyrgyzstan. At this time Joint Council cannot confirm the exact contents of the conversation.

Further, we can confirm that police investigations are occurring in Kyrgyzstan in regards to accusations surrounding child buying for intercountry adoption. No further information on this subject is available at this time. As soon as more information is available Joint Council will release it on our website.

Help is Just a Click Away

2009-03-03T08:12:00.003-05:00

By just clicking on the Google ads in the sidebar, you make an automatic contribution to those that help folks in Central Asia. John Wright said they received $20 in just five days. As more folks add the ad and others start "clicking" the ad, the amount should grow.

If you don't have anything to do, would you take a minute to do some clicking?

Rita

Helping Those So That They Can Help Others

2009-02-26T19:23:00.003-05:00

This is about a wonderful family that helps the less fortunate in Kyrgyzstan. The Wrights want to be in Kyrgyzstan full time helping, but money is always the problem. They have spent everything they own. If you want to make a difference please consider making a contribution.

Let's Get It Right for the Wrights!

Dear Friends of the Wrights,

We all know and understand the effectiveness of the work John, Julie, and family have done in Kyrgyzstan - the country they love so much and have been called to. Let's get them there ON THE GROUND full time! We can do this.

This post is coming out with other blog posts all over the country - people who have blogs that know the Wrights. Let's shock them with the provision of financial resources and letters/notes of encouragement to help them return to Kyrgyzstan. They want to go as full time missionaries - they just need our help to get them there.

We propose that we raise a minimum of the following:

$20,000 to cover a year's needs on the home front

• Home expenses - the place to come back to

$30,000 to cover a year's needs on the foreign front

• Travel in and out of the country with family 2 x a year

• Travel in the country to the different sites

• Family expenses - including the educational needs of one daughter

• Lodging and meals

This is just $50,000. We can do this and we can do it quickly. Here is how. Go to JOHN'S Blog and hit the button that is for the Wrights..support.

www.actofkindness.blogspot.com

AND guess what - you can watch all that is done there on his blog..you will learn to live vicariously in a healthy way by reading and supporting the RIGHT cause. What an opportunity - Will you help?

Let's do it RIGHT FOR THE WRIGHTS!

More News Out of Kyrgyzstan

2009-02-19T20:51:00.000-05:00

Kyrgyz Republic Government Addresses Regulation of Adoption Procedures

BISHKEK (AKIpress) – Kyrgyzstan's prime minister, Igor Chudinov, has signed a Kyrgyz Republic (KR) government directive addressing child adoption issues. This was reported today, February 17, 2009, by the KR Government Press Service.

The document in question was approved with a view toward regulating the procedure for adoption of children who are citizens of the Kyrgyz Republic, and improving the Kyrygz Republic's legal framework in that area.

Given those considerations, and in accordance with Article 130 of the Kyrgyz Republic Family Code, the Government of the Kyrygz Republic resolves:

To declare invalid Section 3. "Adoption of Children Who Are Kyrgyz Republic Citizens by Foreign Citizens" in the "Statute Regarding Rules for the Placement of Children Without Parental Guardianship for Adoption by Cititzens of the Kyrgyz Republic, and by Foreign Citizens", as approved by KR Government Resolution No. 121 on February 22, 2006, "Regarding Confirmation of the Statute Regarding Rules for the Placement of Children Without Parental Guardianship for Adoption by Cititzens of the Kyrgyz Republic, and by Foreign Citizens".

Simultaneously, it is resolved that adoption of children from the Kyrgyz Republic by foreign citizens or stateless persons shall be authorized only if an international treaty exists between Kyrgyzstan and the foreign state.

The KR Ministry of Education and Science and the KR Ministry of Labor and Social Development have been assigned to submit by March 31, 2009, following established procedure, their proposals regarding improvement of those statutes that regulate child adoption.

Pursuant to this document personal responsibility for compliance with KR legislation in adoption matters is placed upon the heads of state administrations at the level of the republic's regions and districts.

It should be noted that this directive becomes effective immediately on the date of its official publication.

AKIpress

A New JCICS Post (Or If We Didn't Have Bad Luck...)

2009-02-18T18:16:00.003-05:00

We have waited since July of 08 for a referral, and nothing has been happening in Kyrgyzstan since that time. Because of this stagnation, approximately 60 families have waited for months and months for a court date, with no end in sight, even though they have already met and bonded with a child. Countless other children remain in orphanages, and agencies are not getting any additional referrals.

We are going to remain on a wait list for Kyrgyzstan, but we are now going to throw our hat into the ring with Russia. If we didn't have bad luck in international adoption, we would have no luck at all. We will, however, persevere because we won't stop trying.

Here is the latest JCICS post:

February 17, 2009 - The U.S. Department of State does not recommend that U.S. citizens consider adoption from Kyrgyzstan at this time. Currently, no adoption cases are being processed, including at least sixty-five adoption cases by U.S. citizens already in progress. In addition, the Kyrgyz government is considering significant changes to its adoption regulations.

The Kyrgyz Government has formed an adoption commission that includes officials from the Vice Prime Minister’s office, the Ministries of Education, Social Protection and Labor, Foreign Affairs, Internal Affairs, and Justice, as well as the General Prosecutor’s office. This commission is responsible for drafting new adoption policy and legislation, with special emphasis on clarifying the roles and responsibilities of the different agencies involved. The commission will recommend whether the Kyrgyz Republic should join the Hague Convention on Intercountry Adoption. The commission plans to report to Parliament by March 20; the Parliament will then choose what action it will take on these proposals. The Kyrgyz government does not intend to process any adoption cases, new or pending, until the adoption commission issues its report and Parliament has taken action on its recommendations.

Although the new legislation likely will not affect existing cases of children already matched with adoptive parents, it will allow the Ministry of Education authority to resume processing these adoption dossiers. New adoption cases would be subject to any new requirements established by Parliament.

The U.S. Embassy continues to monitor the situation and will provide clarification as soon as it is received. This notice has also been posted at Adoption.State.Gov/news/notices.html.

Another JCICS Post

2009-01-24T15:14:00.003-05:00

January 23, 2009 - It is Joint Council's understanding that 17 high ranking officials of the Kyrgyz government, including the Minister of Education and the Vice-Minister of Education, have been removed from their positions. Obviously this will have an effect on in-process intercountry adoptions. It is currently unclear exactly how the changes will effect in-process cases. As more information becomes available Joint Council will update the website.

Please see the post dated January 24, 2009 on the Ann's blog, "myadoptiongeography.blogspot.com/" for more details.

Inauguration Day

2009-01-21T17:44:00.003-05:00

I took Aiden to a local coffee shop to watch the inauguration on the big screen and make it a celebratory event rather than just another show on tv. While drinking hot cocoa and eating a bagel with cream cheese, Aiden watched our 44th President of the United States sworn in. He didn't understand it all, but he understood enough.

I hope we can leave this world a better place for our children.

About Blog Wallpaper and TVs

2009-01-04T14:56:00.002-05:00

I am seeing a whole lot of darling blogs. I'm talking totally gorgeous. Where does this breathtaking wallpaper come from? Does this cost money?

I'm always caught between remaining hip and trendy, and keeping things simple and basic. I generally just remain caught in the middle. For example, we have a 20+ year old TV. There is a dead zone at the top of the screen, and people's heads are chopped off at the forehead because of it. We have to bang the side of the TV for the picture to come in. We can afford to go out tomorrow to get a new TV, but it just isn't important to us. We don't even have cable. We care next to nothing about this. Next month we won't have a picture at all when we turn on the TV. I suppose we will get a TV then. Maybe.

When I see the TVs at the store I'm amazed at the colors and detail of the picture. Aiden just sits down in the middle of the TV aisle staring at all the TVs, and is in the twilight zone of course. But I still feel no compulsion to get one, except for the thought of the minimal floor space we would gain from having the TV on the wall instead of a table.

I'd appreciate some feedback on blog wallpaper options. I may not buy a TV, but I'll surely consider some hip and trendy free blog wallpaper.

Happy New Year

2009-01-02T08:41:00.003-05:00

We are thankful for all the experiences of the past year, both positive and painful, as they make us who we are today. We look forward to the new, and wish everyone peace, love, happiness, health, and acceptance in the coming year.

Drew and Aiden spent New Year's Eve cruising the family-oriented activities downtown at the waterfront. It is nice that we are so close to downtown. I have some sort of a cold, possibly strep throat, so I tried to get some rest. I will call the doctor today to see if I should be tested.

The weather is delightful. Highs around 70 and cool enough for a comforter at night.

We cleaned out three boxes from the attic this week. More is coming down this coming week. Almost all the infant things will be donated. We can get what we need again if we need it. Aiden enjoys replaying with the baby toys. He doesn't remember them (it seems like just yesterday), but plays with them nonetheless. I like getting things out of the house. Drew says soon I'm going to remove him from the house too.

I'm beginning to add adoption blog links to my blog. It is a good way to keep the blogs in one place so that I can find them.

Showing Off A Little

2008-12-25T19:12:00.002-05:00

About two year ago I started quilting. More precisely, I enjoy designing the quilt top, piecing it together, and sewing it. I am not a fan of the actually quilting, meaning stitching the quilt top, the quilt back, and the batting together. I let someone else do that. I'm posting a picture of the body of the quilt I just finished for Drew for Christmas. It is supposed to have an "ocean" feel to it.

A Little More

2008-12-25T16:47:00.004-05:00

Our blog has been mostly about our adoption journey. I am adding a little more to it, mostly for our benefit.

We are a family heavily focused on education and knowledge. Most of the books our son has are classical children's literature, or have a math or science focus to them. I have now added educational blogs and websites I like to my blog.

Maybe Some Good News?

2008-12-25T13:32:00.002-05:00

I heard through the adoption grapevine that there may be movement in Kyrgyzstan after the holidays. That is the middle of January. It isn't anything official. We are hopeful nonetheless.

I added some questions for a mother's journal to my blog. I have a couple years of Wondertime magazines, and the questions come from an insert. I find the questions different than most lists I have seen. I hope they will be of interest to someone. I will keep adding topics to consider as I go through the magazines. After several years I am only now getting around to reading them.

What Does the US State Department Post Mean?

2008-12-14T12:39:00.002-05:00

My understanding of this post is that Kyrgyzstan officials are not yet saying when they will begin processing adoption paperwork (they have been addressing IA issues internally since summer). The DOS is not saying that adoptions will not continue, or that the country is closed to international adoption. The DOS says, in a subsequent post, that they do not recommend families to start adoption in Kyrgyzstan because there just is no information available from Kyrgyz officials right now. We are waiting until the Kyrgyzstan government has addressed the issues they chose to address, and waiting until they are ready to tell us what they want to tell us. This is all not new information, although when Kyrgyzstan stopped processing adoptions this past summer everyone thought it was just for a few weeks or a couple months.

It is hard to wait. Yet there are families that were in Kyrgyzstan on trip one in spring, met their children, and are just waiting for paperwork to be signed so that they can go and pick up the child. Please send positive thoughts for those families.

JCICS Post

2008-12-09T20:02:00.000-05:00

December 3, 2008 - Joint Council has confirmed that the U.S. Embassy
in Kyrgyzstan has been requesting further information on the current
state of intercountry adoptions from the Kyrgyz government. At this
time, it is our understanding that the Kyrgyz Parliament has concerns
regarding the governmental control of Adoption Service Providers in
the republic.

In meetings with Kyrgyz officials, the US Embassy stressed that the
current actions are causing fiscal and emotional distress to potential
adoptive parents. Kyrgyz officials have been unwilling to comment as
to the processing of cases already in progress. However, a
governmental working group will be forming in the coming weeks. We do
not expect any official statement to come from this working group
before the end of 2008.

Disjointed Blog

2008-11-10T14:46:00.004-05:00

We removed a great deal of travel details from our trip to Ukraine. In summary we had three appointments, but did not find our child. We knew this might be a possibility because people talked about this happening to them. There were no administrative problems, no paperwork problems, or anything odd about our experience. Ukraine is encouraging domestic adoptions, and they have recently publicly announcing that there are very few healthy children available in the somewhat younger age ranges. We found this to be true, even though we were open to a relatively wide age range, no preferred sex, and did not expect a very healthy child. If anyone wants any details they may leave a comment and I will gladly email them directly. I personally advise those that are planning to adopt from Ukraine to educate yourself so that you know what to expect and what the outcomes may be. Nobody should adopt with their head in the sand, or think that this cannot happen to them.

We are extremely excited and optimistic about our plans to adopt from Kyrgyzstan.
We find Kyrgyzstan to be a very ethical and child-centered process. From all I learn the children are loved and cared for in the care facilities.

Minor Comments

2008-09-23T09:17:00.002-05:00

We received our one-time-free I171H reissue a couple weeks ago. It said we are approved for one child when in fact we are approved for two children. It is being reissued again to reflect two children. USCIS was very fast acknowledging my inquiry. I considered leaving it be since we are not requesting two children, but decided to go ahead and make the change because you never know what can happen.

I found out that we are approx. 12th in line for a referral with our agency. They wouldn't give a specific number. It is where we thought we would be.

I have considered opening my adoption blog up to other topics. I am amazed by the number of blogs some people maintain. Adoption blogs, family blogs, homeschooling blogs, etc. We have one private blog about our son, Aiden, and is meant to be a journal of his life. I'm not very good about keeping it updated. This is our second blog. I may consolidate the two, or at least add other topics to this one and keep the private blog as is.

Blog Award

2008-09-11T16:25:00.001-05:00

Amy! Thank you for the blog award. That is way cool. This blog is so boring I can't believe anyone even reads it. Rita

We are Registered In Kyrgyzstan

2008-09-11T16:17:00.002-05:00

I verified with our agency that our dossier is registered with the Kyrgyz government in Kyrgystan. Our dossier will remain there until we have a referral. At that time it will be legalized and translated. We are just waiting now. The courts are not granting any adoptions right now anyway, so there is no point in wondering how long it will take. We do hope it will be within a year. We will need to get the rest of the money together. I'll think about that tomorrow. We are content with the progress at this point.

On another note, we should have our one-time-free reissued I171H shortly.

"Older Child": A Matter of Perspective

2008-08-16T19:38:00.004-05:00

Our request to the Kyrgyz government is for a female child under 3 years old. We hope they view us favorably and grant our request. We are aware that very few people request a child this old, and we will therefore be near the top of the "older child list". Most families adopting from Kyrgyzstan are hoping to adopt infants. Some referrals are so young that PAPs cannot go to court to adopt them because they must be 3 months old.

Ukraine Still on Our Mind

2008-08-10T15:47:00.002-05:00

Our now five year old son, Aiden accompanied us to Ukraine. He loved it and there was not a moment that we wished that we had left him behind. He asks almost daily about going back to Ukraine. I ask him what he liked about it. He says he liked the apartment. I liked the apartment too. It had good bones, and I feel as though it had some stories to tell. We spent five weeks, give or take a few days, in that one-bedroom apartment. I think I liked experiencing the basics of life in that one-bedroom apartment. It had a very slow washing machine, and no dryer. We didn't miss the dryer. We didn't miss an oversized refrigerator and freezer stuffed full of food. We didn't miss too many clothes from which to chose to wear that day. We did not miss the excesses we live with on a daily basis. I surely don't want to say that life was simpler because I can see many obstacles to overcome living in Ukraine. Yet too many choices can also disturb the mind.

I am sorry we won't spend a great deal of time in Kyrgyzstan when our time comes.

What Happens to a Dossier Anyway?

2008-08-09T13:44:00.002-05:00

This is our process as far as we know. Dossier goes to Kyrgyzstan for approval and registration. Dossier comes back to the US and is kept by the agency or the Foundation. At some point it will be translated, and probably authenticated but it isn't clear where this happens in the process yet. We may or may not have to get it state certified. We don't have to keep updating the documents like for Ukraine. We will have to update some if not all documents just before getting our referral or at least prior to traveling on trip #1 to meet our referred child. As more recent adoptions are completed with our agency we will have more details.

I read that the new adoption committee in Bishkek has been created and should be meeting soon. Things should be picking up shortly in Krygyzstan. I am very grateful to the folks on the KyrgyzstanAdoptionGroup for posting what they are finding out.

Dossiers and Mindful Consumption

2008-08-01T12:57:00.005-05:00

Our dossier was received and approved this week by our adoption agency. I received an email last night that our dossier is ready to be shipped to Kyrgyzstan. I'm not sure what happens with it when it gets there, but I've asked the question and I'm waiting for the answer.

Since things are moving along on the adoption path I focus again on funding. I found this wonderful meditation group that meets on Wednesday evening. August is the month that participants may wish to consider their consumption, which isn't necessarily defined by just that which costs money. I have personally given this some attention in recent months and feel as though I made some personal progress reducing my personal consumption of "stuff" (the money factor)and hope to realize more opportunities to reduce my financial consumption. I still have a lot of work to do with regard to consumption of information and knowledge, as well as of time.

A Few More Blogs

2008-07-27T13:44:00.002-05:00

I added a couple more blogs to my list of Blogs Worth Viewing. It is moving to read of the work these folks are doing for the less fortunate in Kyrgyzstan. John Wright is an amazing man. I hope I am fortunate enough to meet him one day. See his work on actofkindness.

Pictures from Ukraine

2008-07-26T16:31:00.005-05:00

I thought I would take a few minutes to add pictures of our trip to Ukraine. I still communicate with a family or two that go over to adopt. Thankfully families are still finding their children, but I know of too many that did not.

This is a picture of me and Aiden hanging out in the livingroom. I had to clothes-pin his pants since they were too big for him.

This is the standard adoption photograph most families take after their appt. We were still optimistic at this point.

How cool is a snowstorm for a four year old boy from Florida?

Our favorite place in Kyiv, and not listed in any travel guide. Pocrofsky Church. I hope I spelled that correctly. It is a functioning church and monestary. The nuns living there are delightful. The courtyard is a sanctuary within a large city. We walked it daily to get to the St. Michael's area. the nuns sweep the snow away from the doorways with Ukrainian style brooms. These brooms are everywhere, and we purchased two at an open air market to bring home with us.

We took about 1000 pictures. Many are off the beaten path. I wish we had taken 1000 more. Kyiv is a fascinating city.

Now We Wait (Again)

2008-07-26T09:45:00.002-05:00

Ho Hum, we have been here before. Our dossier is in the mail to our agency. Now we wait (again). We will keep updating the documents (some expire after 3 months) but we don't really know what is next. For a control freak like me that isn't an easy pill to swallow.

I'm not much of a blog reader. There are a lot of good blogs and this Mom doesn't have a lot of free time. I did find one that I found worth viewing. It isn't about adoption. It is filled with pictures of Kyrgyzstan and brief thoughts regarding those pictures. Please take a moment to look at it. I don't think I will add any adoption blogs to the blog list. The are worth viewing of course, but there are plenty of adoption blogs that contain other adoption blogs and I don't need to repeat what is already done.

I hope to add some pictures to this blog soon.

Rita

Paperwork Almost Together

2008-07-10T20:25:00.003-05:00

Boring time. We have the updated I171H. We will have everything in a few days except the medical forms unless the doctors don't take their time about it. Maybe they won't. We are just about there.

Instead of waiting to get our dossier together until closer to referral time we were now told to put it together and the families that have them together the soonest are the ones that get their referrals first. Maybe that is good and makes it all happen faster for us. Maybe it puts us farther behind than before. I'm sure we won't know and I won't think about it.

I don't know what more to write. We will be adopting from the Bishkek orphanage. There are only two orphanages where our adoptions happen, at least at this point. Tokmok is the other city. Bishkek is the capital of the country.

I hope I get to travel around the country a bit. I cannot imagine going half way around the world to such a facinating place and not taking it in. How better to let your adopted child know about their homeland than to tell them about your experiences traveling in their native country? I want to stay in a yurt. I want to travel in the countryside.

Someone asked about the process. It doesn't seem that clear to us. It seems the dossier goes to the Krgyz Embassy for review and then back to the agency/foundation to be held until referral time. There is a translation period too, although it doesn't seem to happen right away. Our agency told us to hold off getting our dossier state certified, but that doesn't mean it won't be certified at time point. Timeframes seem to have changed too. In March it was four to six months and one year on the far end. Now agencies are saying two years (and not saying whether that is realistic or on the far end). Many of the original agencies working in this country are no longer accepting applications because it is a small country and adoptions seem to be happening out of just two orphanages. I know of one agency that is telling people there is a one trip option. Most other agencies are saying two trips. The first trip seems to be of varying lengths. I don't know why it is so different for different agencies. I don't know if it has to do exclusively with the different regions or if each agency just has different experiences.

I suppose the one thing you can bank on is that international adoption is always a changing thing, but then so is life.

Any Western Trained Doctors in Kyrgyzstan?

2008-06-10T16:07:00.003-05:00

We wonder if we are able to hire a local doctor with Western medical experience while in Kyrgystan. We were so satisfied with this option in Ukraine and wish it exists in Kyrgystan. If anyone knows...PLEASE leave some info in a comment. I did a quick websearch. Didn't find too much except a list of doctors that do examinations for the Canadian Embassy. I wonder if that is an option? Probably a remote one.

There are a few more documents required by the Embassy of Kyrgyz Republic. Our agency says we don't need them. I think it is wise to be proactive and collect them. From what I can tell this temporary closing of the Embassy is in part to standardize the dossier requirements.

We get our fingerprints update on Saturday. The new homestudy should be done and in the mail to USCIS. I'm in a good position with our documents. I should be able to collect them quickly when it is time.

Back in the Ballgame

2008-06-02T20:37:00.002-05:00

So we are doing our paper chase again, although a bit more slowly than before. We were advised to wait on compiling some of the paperwork until our agency feels we are within 3 months of getting a referral. Apparently paperwork for Kyrgyzstan is only good for 3 months. We have our fingerprint appointment to update our I171H, we submitted the request to change the country to Kyrgyzstan, and our new homestudy is done. A copy of the homestudy will go to USCIS for the I171H now. I have all the "do it yourself" documents completed, i.e., copies of passports, pictures of the house, power of attorney, etc. The "outside" documents will be the criminal clearances, medical letters, etc. It isn't too bad actually.

The Kyrgyzstan yahoo board is talking about a few new documents required for the country. I hope it isn't anything too difficult. There has been some talk about FBI clearance and fingerprinting to be sent off to VA. We will see. I've found one person that is adopting from the same country and with the same agency. That is nice.

I can't think of anything else to write about, and my son and I just took a blueberry buckle out of the oven. Yummmm, it smells so good and it is made from scratch using organic locally grown blueberries!

Small StepsToward Moving Forward

2008-05-16T12:54:00.003-05:00

We picked the agency and I have the contract here signed and notarized. I haven't mailed it yet. Contract terms are terrible no matter who you deal with. Some are downright unbelievable. Those we just tossed in the trash. Nobody in their right mind would sign these contracts if it weren't for an adoption. I can now truly understand why you have to trust your agency because you sign away all your right in return for costly hope!

We sent our letter to USCIS asking for an appointment to update our fingerprints. We also asked to have our country changed. We already had our homestudy done last month. I'm not sure if there is a form to fill out to get the country changed. I'll call our social worker or just hear back from USCIS if I drag my feet long enough.

Ok, really, really, I'm putting the contract in the mail next week.

Nothing New to Report

2008-04-13T13:08:00.002-05:00

We are still deciding on an agency. I hate it. I wish we could do this independently.

I added a new element to the blog; a map tracker.

We met Carolyn and Jack along with their sons Joe and Max. Max was adopted from Ukraine last year. Both boys are delightful. They had a winner with Joe and found another awesome son in Ukraine.

Just Rambling Thoughts

2008-03-26T20:05:00.002-05:00

Shawn and Megan, thank you for the suggestion of using worldtimesaver clocks. They are not as cool as the other clocks, but they show up on the blog!

Jessica, I'm sorry I cannot make this Saturday's gathering. We are attending a wedding. I hope to get to one of the events as soon as my life slows down a little.

Am I the only one that seems to have a huge list of things to do each day and still not get anywhere?

I haven't picked an agency yet. I hate doing due diligence. I wish there weren't so many choices. Right now I am considering Frank Adoption Center in NC and Holt International. I love what I know about Holt. It seems their first focus is finding families for children. Their second focus is finding children for families. It sounds like the same thing, but it isn't. It is prioritizing who is most important, the child or the family. But with Holt we have to be open to a child of either sex and older then we would initially want. We were to the point of making huge compromises in Ukraine and it still didn't work out, and we have to think about whether to make compromises now. We would love any child we brought home, but we aren't asking for an infant so it seems we should be ahead of the wait. What do I know at this point anyway?

My friends the Paulsens are home from Ukraine with their daughter. They are so happy and I am so happy for them. Hopefully I will meet Jocelyn soon. My friend Michelle and her husband will be home soon with their daughter. She had a fairy tale adoption in Ukraine. Thankfully this still happens. What a nightmare for the kids if it didn't.

The weather here is awesome! I've been working in the yard as much as possible before the scorching days of spring summer arrive. A wonderful friend got our water pump and primitive sprinkler system working while we were in Ukraine and I am almost at the point of flipping a switch and having the whole yard watered. It sure beats standing outside with the mosquitoes hand watering everything. We have no grass but we have the beginnings of a Key West style tropical garden.

Right now it is 44 degrees F in bishkek, KGZ. That isn't bad. Oh, I just know we will end up traveling again in winter. It sure would be nice to get a break from the summer heat and travel to a cooler country in the summer. I know it gets to be around 90 degrees F in Kyrgyzstand, but that is cool enough for us!

Rita

That Darn Clocklink Clock

2008-03-19T19:05:00.002-05:00

I was shocked to see four comments posted on our blog. How kind of everyone to be thinking of and praying for us.

I vividly remember spending an entire day trying to get the Clocklink clock to show up on our blog a year ago. Now, again, I cannot get it to show up as I'm adding elements for Kyrgyzstan. Why should I care? I just want it, that's why. The Clocklink instructions are not terribly helpful, although more helpful then last year. Yeah, they tell you what to do, but I don't get it, and I really need the cut and paste data. I am apparently very blog-challenged. Even my IT genius husband can't get it working. He can do anything with computers, but he doesn't do html.

Adding the flag, however, was no challenge at all.

Rita

We Have Regrouped and Are Moving Forward

2008-03-19T16:23:00.006-05:00

We were down but never out. Ukraine will have to wait for us. We may go back in the future for an older child (I wonder how many kids I can convince my husband to adopt?). We are switching gears (can you hear them?). We are looking into Kyrgyzstan. We are currently checking out agencies. We signed up for the Kyrgyzstan adoption board and the Agency Research Board (boy, do I hate to have to use an agency). The people and the children are beautiful. The process does not sound corrupt at all, which is very important to us. Kyrgyzstan is south of Kazakstan, east of China, north of Tajikistan and west of Uzbekistan.

Will write more about the country later. I hope to get a map of the country posted today.

We are Going Home

2008-03-07T13:09:00.003-05:00

Our third referral is too sick to leave his groupa. This poor child cannot function outside his groupa. He is so mentally challenged that he cannot be considered for adoption. We were shown his file nonetheless.

We are done here and are returning home.

We sat in the hallway of the SDA until we were allowed to meet with the Director. We asked why we were shown files three different times of children that were so much worse then their files stated. We asked why we were not allowed to call the orphanage director during our third appointment. We were told that the SDA staff is too busy to keep the files current or accurate and that they rely upon the families to take the referrals and report back to the SDA about the childrens' status. This information isn't consistently added to the children's files.

We were told that it was illegal for us to have had our 3rd appointment. (Third appointments are not illegal.) We were asked if we were asking to have members of the SDA break the law by being allowed to see more files. Even though we reiterated numerous times that we were looking for a child with correctable health issues or a child that had the cognitive ability to function within a family unit and that the child or 2 children could be of either sex and up to 7 years old we were told that there are no files that would meet our criteria. The SDA Director told us that there are no healthy children under 8 or 10 years old. She said that she is working with the US Embassy to update their website to reflect this information. She said that Ukrainians do not abandon their children in orphanages if they are healthy. She said that prospective adoptees that want healthy children go to countries like China where children are abandoned for reasons other then health.

We did not receive nor did we think we would be offered an apology for being shown inaccurate and outdated files. It is our perception based on this conversation that the SDA has no interest in keeping the files current or accurate. It is our conclusion that there is no concern for adopting families traveling blindly to far away regions in their country based on wrong data. The excuse we were offered was that it was God's will that we did not find our child here. From our perspective the reason is that we are forced to make decisions on children with information that is completely inaccurate and outdated. Thankfully for many families the inaccuracies plays in their favor. For us the inaccurancies did not.

We did not fail the children of Ukraine. We see them being failed by their own government. I saw piles of files in every room we were in during the selection process. We are told by complete strangers in this process that when the SDA is called by orphanage directors or city inspectors the SDA has no record of the child, and that the files sit on desks of medical doctors who don't feel there is any need to expedite their updating. Based on dates given to us during our appointments, children are available for adoption months before they are ever shown to prospective adoptees.

It is so saddening and heartbreaking for the children. These children run to you, cry for you, gaze at you from afar because they so desperately want a Mama and a Papa to love them. We do not cry for ourselves. To try to make sense of it all is futile as there is no logic or humanity in it. We are going home and we know in our hearts that we did as much as we could for a child in Ukraine.

We are Traveling Just South of Odessa

2008-03-03T13:10:00.003-05:00

We leave tomorrow evening on the night train to Odessa. We will travel 2 hours south of there to visit a 6 year old boy.

It is difficult finding the words of thanks we feel to those that are praying for, think of, and sending love to us. We have been given another and our last chance to find our child in Ukraine. We hope this boy is the one.

We do not know if we will have internet access in the region. We are not going to a large city. We will post when we can. I will drive Drew crazy about an internet connection in our apartment, so if there is a way he will find it.

I am so proud and impressed with the behavior of our beloved son today. It was a very trying and boring day for him. He grasped the importance of this day and behaved so well. It is hard for a 4 year old boy to be still for a long time.

Rita

How To Research Medical Information

2008-02-29T12:24:00.002-05:00

Someone asked in a comment how to prepare for the medical information. We found a lot of files in the Adopt_From_Ukraine yahoo group. If you can get past all the bickering there is some good information from this group. Use the group to your advantage. At least pick over the file section and post for medical reference material. I hope that is helpful. I do not have the electronic files here to email to anyone right now. Rita

No News Friday

2008-02-29T12:16:00.002-05:00

We were hoping for some news today but received none. We will try again on Monday. Next week will be a time of assessing our situation.

We thank everyone for their emails, comments, prayers and positive thoughts. It means a great deal to us to read what you write.

We hope the path of others that come after us will be much smoother. Decide if you can live with the worst outcome, prepare for it, then rejoice in your success.

Rita

Waiting for Our Path to Unfold

2008-02-28T06:07:00.002-05:00

We are in Kyiv at our original apartment. In a way it is like coming back home. We have grown comfortable to some degree here. We will be patient and wait to see what will unfold on our path.

There is a purpose to everything. Sometimes the answers come over time and will remain unknown until we are ready for them. We will reflect on all that has happened and remain open for our answers. We will focus on accepting all that is.

The emails and comments from perfect strangers have moved us and are greatly appreciated. There is great compassion in this world.

We Are Going Back to Kyiv

2008-02-27T06:45:00.004-05:00

We are healthy and physically fine, but we are heading back to Kyiv. It has been an emotionally difficult time here in the region. with regard to the adoption process.

I understand why people don't post a lot of information on their blogs now. It is an emotional rollercoaster ride and it leaves you empty and worn. Often you must just be quiet, patient, regain your emotional endurance, and wait to see what will happen.

This is the hardest thing we have endured, or at least the equivalent of a medical crisis within the family. It is heartwrenching and not for those with a lack of emotional endurance.

Aiden is homesick but springs back quickly with a little playing outside and compassion and understanding. A little chocolate before lunch rather then for dessert doesn't hurt either. We live in the moment now.

I am sorry for the limited information. It is necessary for the moment.

Rita

Last Weekend in Kiev

2008-02-24T00:45:00.005-05:00

Since we leave Sunday night we need to finish off what we still want to do in Kiev. I could have slept all day yesterday, but we found another church on our list located just north of Independence Square. We then headed over to St. Sophias and it started to rain. We will try to tour St. Sophias today before catching the night train to our region.

We met the Johnson family for dinner last night. They are finishing their paperwork before heading home to the States. They are a lovely family and their daughter is a delightful girl. She is perfect and charming and cute. Aiden loved playing with her and didn't want her to go home with the Johnsons. We hope we find a daughter this delightful.

There is nothing new to post. The city/town we will be in is relatively small and doesn't have a lot of tourist sites, but it is known for its natural surroundings. Summer would be more ideal in this area, but we will make the best of it and we also have a little one with us to keep us entertained and busy. So far we have had no down time at all.

We have Another Referral

2008-02-22T12:29:00.003-05:00

We have a referral for a girl. We are heading south on the overnight train, probably on Sunday. She is 4 years old. We think this may work out. We are cautiously optimistic. The files we saw at the SDA were much better today. We were shown many files. Perhaps too many as the information was overwhelming and coming at us too quickly. Please wish us the best. We will post as soon as possible.

Congratulations to the other families here that have met their children. We are very happy for you.

If You Are Using an American IA Doctor

2008-02-21T23:15:00.001-05:00

We heard through the grapevine that a couple declined a referral of two relatively healthy children because their American IA doctor scared the wits out of them with maybes. Now I'm no expert by any means, and I'm just passing on a perspective that was discussed with me here in Ukraine by Ukrainian experts. Under the circumstances, American IA doctors need to protect themselves from liability in addition to helping you. They will not tell you that there is nothing wrong with the children and that you should adopt them.

A Second Appointment!

2008-02-21T22:54:00.003-05:00

Our translator called to inform us that we have a second appointment tomorrow. We are so excited and so scared. Going through a second appointment will make us turn gray earlier then expected. It is one of the most nerve wrecking times in our life. We hope we find our child today. Will post again as soon as possible. We will not know where we are going until after we make a selection and we will more then likely be leaving very quickly. We do not know if we will have internet access. Please send us the best of luck.

Aiden was very homesick last night. He was not making good choices and said he wanted to be a mean guy. Then he just blurted out to me that he wanted to go home to our house and didn't want to have a brother or sister any more. Poor kid. He does remarkably well most of the time but nighttime can be difficult for him. I think a lot of the food from the grocery store has a lot of sugar in it (I can't read the labels) and that isn't helping him stay calm.

Back to the SDA

2008-02-20T11:51:00.003-05:00

We went back to the SDA this afternoon to talk to the #2 person about getting a second appointment. Our translator will call her back tomorrow to see what update is given at that point. We ran in Dr. Yuri outside the SDA. He said he talked with a family that seems to have turned down a relatively healthy sibling referral (2) based mostly on fear. We hope we make it to the point of making a decision on a relatively healthy child.

I wonder if most people know that the imfamous SDA hallway is really a stairwell. There is a small hallway through a doorway if you want to call it a hallway, but it has a couch in it and is really for people waiting to see someone inside the office.

We had a late lunch at our favorite Ukrainian cafeteria and met with the Paulsens for an hour before they too headed over to the SDA. I hope things work out for them with a second referral.

We walked back to the apartment through the courtyard at Pocrafvsky(?) Church and picked up a couple pictures of some saints. There is a delightful kiosk in the courtyard selling all kinds of religious items. Our translator said this church is not listed in any tourist book because it is purely an operating church and monestary.

Drew thinks the answer to a good night of sleep is a couple beers, so I'm going to try one and see if I can finish it.

Exploring Kyiv

2008-02-19T11:55:00.004-05:00

We spent the day exploring St. Andrew's Street and Old Town. I made a list in the morning of places to see in Old Town and then left my guide book at home. We found several churches and took many pictures. Unfortunately none of the churches we found were the churches in the tourbook. Nonetheless the day was not a waste. Old Town is quite charming (I seem to say that a lot) and we will take the Funacular down to Podil and pickup where we left off. I recommend picking up a couple of the travel guides while in the States. The two lent to us are quite different and together make for some good reference information.

Our translator is weaving her magic. There is nothing transparent here. You have to trust your translator and we do. We are still here and have not been sent home and we are still hoping and chosing to be optimistic that the SDA will looking kindly upon us and give us a second appointment.

The bread here is devine. Several of the loaves we have purchased have had seeds on top of them with such a distinctive taste. I cannot place them and may not have had them before. Please leave a comment if you know what they are.

It began to snow quite heavily this afternoon on our return home. We found a back way to our apartment along the hilltop overlooking Old Town and we then cut through the walkway at Pocrofvski Church and the woman's monestary. I hope I am spelling that correctly as I have not seen the church noted in any reference material and it is just a delightful place to stroll. It must be beautiful in the Spring and Summer when the rose gardens and vegetable gardens are in their glory. Aiden was a real trooper on our 3-4 hour walk today. He became whiny toward the end, but we found some baby stroller tracks, and tracks are the end all for Aiden. He walked the tracks to see where they led us, which was right back to our apartment.

We Are So Thankful We Did Not Get Sent Home Today

2008-02-18T07:55:00.005-05:00

We did not get sent home when we filed our Petition for Second Appointment. This was a good day and sometimes that is all it takes. We wait now to hear more.

We played at the playgroup between St. Sophia's and St. Michael's. We ate at a fabulous cafeteria style restaurant that is down the first street on the right if you are facin the parking lot entrance to St. Michaels. It is the first door that you have to walk down "into the basement". It is clean, the food is wonderful, and it is not expensive. When we purchase food in restaurants often times you pay by the weight. Our cafeteria choices were weighed for serving size. The cheesecake was European style. No cream cheese but rather more cottage cheese or ricotta like. Our bill was around $12. The bathrooms were clean and the commodes were American style.

We walked along the overlook in the north of Artema Street. The city was built on hills much like Rome. It is a beautiful view and gets you off the city streets. You enter on to Artema again. After a few more blocks we took another side street that lead us to one of the entrances to the lovely church just down the road from the US Consulate. It was another pleasant walk to the apartment with the eyes. We picked up a postcard book for pennies and a lovely silver Ukrainian Orthodox pendant for around $20. Our tranlator said this is a convent and church. Very close by was a death camp during the war and this church helped people escape. The church is around 250 or 300 years old. Not as old as St. Sophia (around 1000 years old), but to us this church and garden is the mostly lovely.

Dr Yuri

2008-02-17T10:32:00.004-05:00

Yes, you are allowed to call your personal medical doctor during the appt and go over the files with him/her. I feel it was worth the consulation to know which files to dismiss. You don't want to waste time with files that contain information that you don't want to consider. Do your homework before coming with regard to medical conditions if you don't have an IA doctor. Then again I am offered words of advice from former adoptees that their children had diagnoses they were told to avoid and didn't really have them.

FYI about the appt. There is mixed information on whether your translator is allowed in the appt. Before it was yes and now it is no but we were able to have ours nonetheless probably because one from the SDA was not available. Also, write up sheets of questions to ask and have a separate sheet for each file. Info comes so quickly and you don't want to scribble it down on just a piece of paper.

Please pray for us/send positive thoughts (and to the children). We are fearful about our second appointment request. We are fearful we may not find a child to bring home and to love. While we would like a perfectly healthy child we will be glad to have a child that can just BE an interactive sibling to our exisiting child.

Heartbreak in Ukraine

2008-02-17T10:09:00.006-05:00

Unfortunately our referral did not work out. This boy has much more severe issues than what was presented to us at the SDA appointment and will need full time care. I will never forget this boy. It is heartbreaking leaving a child that needs a home.

We are filing an appeal for a second appointment. We may see what will come of this on Monday or Tuesday.

We were shown no files with remotely healthy children. We requested files for a child up to 6 years of age of either sex. We were shown at least a dozen files. Almost all the pictures were quite good. We are very saddened by the situation. We came to Ukraine because it is the country of my father's family. It breaks our hearts because these children need and deserve parents. We may be able to help them a little financially but cannot bring such a sick child home. I will never ever forget the beautiful boy we visited.

Please send us all your positive thoughts and/or prayers.

We are waiting in Kyiv and did a big grocery shop today. Aiden had us on our last nerve. We purchased a few small toys for him again today. All he wants to do is play on Gameboy and on pc games. I'm ready to throw Gameboy on the street. We are going to stick to our expensive apartment and go to the local parks for entertainment. We are living on the cheap in an expensive city. If we aren't sent home we will have to save our money.

Internet connections are challenging here. 1.5 weeks to figure out how to connect at our apartment. Finding a restaurant with Wifi takes some walking and often the network is down. Oh, yeah, dinner can easily cost $60+. We see people order something to drink so they can sit down to use the Wifi.

There are lots of details to know when coming here. Thankfully we were well prepared in some things, but knowing it and experiencing it are different things. Learn to use the taxi buses. It is easy and will get you around quickly. Pick up maps - several - at the airport. You will use them!!!

That's all for now. Will see what happens at the beginning of the week.

We Have A Referral!

2008-02-13T07:26:00.003-05:00

We have a referral for a boy born Dec 05. He is about 300 km away from Kyiv. His mental abilities are fine. He is one of the smartest kids there and is well liked. He has "contractor of the left knee" and isn't able to stand on it. Our Dr Yuri said we should accept this referral and he will discuss this with an orthopedic doctor friend. His file was only shown beginning yesterday. He has no other medical problems.

Dima is taking us out to purchase some souvenirs. We found Status near Independent Square and ate at a restaurant across the steet down in the lower level or like down into the basement.

I hope to post or reply to emails from anyone that wants some feedback on the SDA appointment. There were not too many good files available today. In fact this was the only file that didn't have serious mental issues or FAS.

Dr. Yuri was worth the $50 consultation fee. He was kind enough to come to our apartmentat 4pm. He is a kind and soft-spoken man.

The churches here are incredibly beautiful. I am in awe of the history of this place and that come only from viewing the architectural beauty. I wish I could spend more time just studying the architecture.

Will try to post again tonight or tomorrow morning. My brain has been scrambled since we arrived.

Rita

First Days in Kyiv

2008-02-12T04:34:00.000-05:00

Sorry for the tardy post. We wanted internet connections in the apartment but didn't get it. We walk across the street to the post office and pay about $1/hour for internet time. It is very convenient, but we cannot use our laptop and you have to take all your email addresses and remember everything you want to do. Anyway, we had some cell phone issues for the first two days that have now been cleared up.

The flight went well. Passport control was a non-issue. We sailed through customs. Our translator was easily found. We went to a grocery store before going to the apartment (with the books and the eyes). Kyiv has anything you need except perhaps peanut butter. Anyone planning to travel here should not bring food stuff or toilettries. I'm not sure about over the counter meds because I didn't check them out.

The weather is actually quite pleasant. We hope to get some toys from a toy store today and take Aiden to a park in the neighborhood.

We met with Dr. Yuri last night. He is worth the time and the small fee for the consultation.

Our SDA appointment is tomorrow at 11am.

We hope to catch up with the Caseys and the Paulsens today. They both have their appointments today.

We are still trying to get our sleep/wake cycles corrected. I've had about 8 hours of sleep since arriving. I just can't sleep. Aiden seemed to be all set but woke up at midnight last night and didn't get back to sleep until 3pm. Drew is getting more sleep but not enough. This sleep thing can drive you to madness.

Little things are making us crazy. The old keyboards at the post office duplicates letters and overlooks spacebar entries. Our pastries dropped in a plastic bag without a bottom (cream all over the bag). Trying to cross the street. We don't get all our change when we pay for stuff. Whoever said don't sweat the small stuff was right.

I'm running out of internet time. I'm not sure how I will ever be able to send pictures. Hope to find a wireless internet place soon. Our translator really doesn't seem to want us to go to one and doesn't seem to know where any are locally. (yeah)

Rita

Off We Go!

2008-02-08T19:59:00.000-05:00

We leave tomorrow. I don't know if you are ever really ready, but we are packed. One check in large duffle rolling bag, two backpacks, and one overnight rolling suitcase. Laptop bag and hand bag too. We will work down a lot of the stuff we brought: protein bars, peanuts, hand sanitizers, diapers, and small gifts. Much of the stuff we are bringing is because we have our son with us.

Will post again when we arrive in Kyiv.

It Is Almost Time

2008-01-28T16:35:00.000-05:00

We leave in less then two weeks. I'm so glad I have my new friend Tracy P to tell me how many days are left before leaving. We are on the same flight to Kyiv.

I think we are all prepared now with the over-the-counter meds and such the only thing remaining. I won't even describe how much work it has been preparing for this trip, daily life with the busy 4 year old boy, and getting Mom situated and handling her household and financial affairs as well as ours. Anyway, all is under control and we have the most generous and loving friends helping us out. We would have never known how blessed we were if we hadn't asked for help from others. I can only hope that I can do for others as much as they have done for us!

We will try to pack tonight and see how that goes. We are really traveling light. I found a free book download website. All of Aiden's homeschool material is on CD so I saved it on our laptop. I may take two small books along for myself and perhaps one for Aiden. Michelle P was so generous and sent us a Gameboy for Aiden. He doesn't know it yet. That should keep him occupied at the worst moments.

I cannot thank all the folks on the Ukrainian Angels yahoo group. They are worth every penny spent to be part of them.

I'm not sure there will be much left to post until we are on route. All of your best wishes, prayers, positive thoughts, positive energy, etc. is appreciated. One person is sending us off with love. Isn't that wonderful?

Time Resolves All Problems

2008-01-06T19:31:00.001-05:00

I have a completed updated dossier. The best news, however, is that MOM IS COMING HOME! We are so excited to have this chapter of life behind us. Mom has made great progress over the last couple weeks. She will stay with us until we leave for Ukraine and then stay with some folks that can help her with her minor care needs. Aiden is delighted to have her home with us temporarily. It is amazing to watch them together. Grandparents and grandchildren have an awesome relationship. What a blessing that Aiden will still have time with his grandmother. Mom is so excited for our adoption trip. It will be wonderful having her around.

We are beginning to pack for our trip. We are keeping things down to a minimum and will forgo the minimal luxuries we chose to have in our daily lives. Simple is so much easier I find. If we do get desperate we will pick up whatever we need in Ukraine.

More Errands Under Our Belts

2007-12-05T14:52:00.000-05:00

We purchased our airline tickets. I think you need a million credit card reward points to actually get free tickets for international travel, but 2 out of 3 free ain't bad.

We have some wonderful neighbors that volunteered to water our plants while we are gone.

I"m printing out as much reference material as I can find to bring with us. I don't think we will be learning much Russian or Ukrainian before leaving. We will have lists.

Ukraine is a cash economy. They want new crisp $100 bills when you pay the "fees". The bank employees look at your cross-eyed when you order a large amount of new $100 bills.

I wrapped Aiden's Christmas presents last night at a MOMS Club wrapping get-together. How much fun will it be to wrap presents for two kids (maybe three?) next year.

I'm sure I'm forgetting to post something but it wasn't written down.

Rita

Gotta Buy the Airline Tickets

2007-11-20T16:50:00.000-05:00

The project du jour is purchasing the airline tickets. First we will try to use our credit card points. Let's see how far that takes us. Aerosvlit (Ukrainian Airlines) and Delta are the only airlines with a direct flight out of the US to Kyiv (JFK). With Aiden in tow that sounds like a good choice to make. Sometimes just a few choices makes it easier then too many choices, particularly when your brain is full of other things to think about.

We have to get most of our documents updated and apostilled again. Several documents will expire in March 2008, and we will be in the middle of our adoption.

I only have to find a pair of gloves for Aiden. This will be my third attempt at getting gloves for him that aren't too big. We are taking 2 backpacks and 1 check in item.

It is Thanksgiving Week. We have so much to be thankful for now and so much to look forward to being thankful about next year.

I have dozens of crotons to put into the ground before we leave. I'm not sure what to do about the tropical oasis I've created in our yard. Our travels come during the dry season here in Florida. I will have to find a kid to water our yard every week or so. How smart was it for us to be water thrifty and not install a sprinkler system???

Our lovely neighbors offered to take our cat, Bella, in during our trip. We are so thankful to have her in someone's house and not in a kennel for boarding. Perhaps a blessing in disguise, we had to put my beloved 19 year old cat, Coty, to sleep on Saturday. What a difficult decision to make. Her health was on a rollercoaster ride for the last year (thyroid issues, mental health issues) and now a very low red blood cell count. She had all but stopped eating and weighed only 4.3 lbs. This time I could not get her eating again. It was her time and she will not have to stay in a kennel now.

When It Rains It Pours

2007-11-14T11:19:00.000-05:00

Our hands are full. Our adoption trip is not the only project. Mom is recovering, slowly but surely, in the skilled nursing facility. I hope and wish she is home before we leave for Ukraine. It would be a gut wrenching choice to make to leave before she is home. We have to resign ourselves to just accepting what is and what will be.

Since we live in Florida we are spending every last dime we will save on winter travel airfare on purchasing winter clothing. An upnorth friend was kind enough to mail us a size 4T winter coat for our son to wear in Ukraine. We hoped to travel with just our Rick Steves travel backpacks, but now realize that we will need a checkin bag for some of our stuff. Fleece clothes may be warm and light weight, but they do not squish down very well. I think we now have a handle on the clothes to take.

Next is the paperwork and reference material. There is so much information to have with you, particularly for an information junkie like me. I can see where the advantage is to using an agency - let them worry about all the little stuff. Well, it is our worries to bear at this point. It will be ok. I contacted Dr. Yuri for his medical services and he has responsed that he will be available to us. He will be worth his weight in gold. We have no doubt that we will use him, if only to have some initial information to give to the pediatrician here in the States.

I cannot think of much else to post. We just have to get everything together now and purchase the travel tickets. It would be great to be able to use our reward points from the credit card company. Otherwise I think we will call Lonnie Rowland.

We Have An Appointment in Kyiv

2007-10-31T13:18:00.000-05:00

February 13, 2008. It will be cold. Whatever we are saving in airline ticket costs traveling in the winter we are spending on winter clothes. Thankfully Drew is approved to use just about every day off he has coming on the trip. We expect it to take 5-7 weeks, and hope it will be shorter. IF everything goes perfectly, which it rarely ever does, it can be done in 4 weeks. Court is a huge time factor, as is processing paperwork. We do not dictate when we need things done, but rather are told when they will be done.

Mom is getting stronger by the day, and we all think she will be back home by the beginning of December. That will be the best Christmas present we could ask for this year.

We hope to find a girl Aiden's age or a little younger in Ukraine. We will be delighted with a boy as well. The primary factors will be health and age. Aiden wants a boy. He wants someone to play with. He doesn't realize he will have to share toys and mom. He is a quick learner though. I wish we could bring a dozen kids home with us. Drew would have to work until he drops over. Perhaps I need to become a teacher one day.

This blog will be our primary form of communication while we are gone. Mom will get a phone number she can call us on. Everyone else will probably need to communicate with us via email. We expect to bring a laptop with us. The best way to get information on what is happening will be to read our blog. Some stuff we won't be able to post or discuss publically until we get home, but everyone will know where we are in the process.

Our Dossier was Finally Submitted

2007-09-27T14:11:00.000-05:00

Monday, September 17, 2002.

We were told that there was NO way our dossier was going to be submitted before it hit the 6-month mark (and when the SDA won't accept a dossier). I was completely taken aback when we received the email from our wonderful faciliator, Valentina. I am very nervous about the date we will have our appointment in Ukraine. We know it will be in December or January. I am hoping it will be January. Mother has been in the hospital since August and will be recovered by January. We hope this will all come together.

Now we need to gather up winter clothing and do our best to take as little as possible in the middle of winter. What a challenge this will be. Drew and I are determined to take only our Rick Steve's backpacks. Aiden will get a rolling carry on bag. I have lists and lists of advice on what to take to travel light, and including all the items would fill several check-in bags. :) It seem surreal right now, and I am still back and forth at the hospital. When we get our date I will have to hop to it.

Just Waiting and Hoping We are Submitted Soon.

2007-06-17T12:31:00.000-05:00

We are waiting for our dossier to be submitted to the SDA. Our facilitator Valentina said we are one of the first families in line to get it submitted. We are not sitting on pins and needles. It will happen when it happens. It is easy for us now to be patient. The age restriction laws that everyone was so worried about were vetoed by the Ukraine President. Since their parliament is also being dissolved, it seems to be a moot issue at this point. That isn't to say that it may not resurface in the future, but we hope it will be after our adoption is completed.

I am dreading having to redo paperwork for the "six month rule". The SDA wants all the documents to be valid for another 6 months when they are submitted. Because you don't know when they will be submitted, you are on continuous alert for dates of documents. Depending upon how long it takes to get them, you have to start working on them in advance so that you can replace the prior document before it hits its 6 month mark. We will begin to update documents at the end of July. Hopefully our dossier will be submitted by then so we won't have to do it.

The Paperwork is on its Way

2007-05-08T17:36:00.000-05:00

I am delighted to report that our documents were FedEx'd to Ukraine on Monday, May 7. They should arrive next Tuesday. It took 10 days to get the documents to the Florida Secretary of State for apostilles and back again. I mailed them out the next business day. I feel as though I am an expert at the paperwork now.

Our main translator is Valentina. I have heard nothing but positive things about her.

We are just over $5500 into the adoption. We expect it be come in under $25k total.

Now we wait to have the documents translated and submitted to the SDA. The SDA takes only a handful of dossiers per week, and then only on Mondays and Thursdays for dossiers from Americans. I spoke with our stateside facilitator, Cathy Harris, today. She guesstimated that we would be traveling in September or October. Of course that could change tomorrow, but if all stays on track as is then that sounds about right to me too based on what I have read on timelines. We will be pulling out our cold weather clothes early for Florida standards, but we will certainly be sick of the heat by then too.

And Yet We Continue...

2007-03-25T10:08:00.000-05:00

We are nearing the end of the paperwork process. I am optimistic that we will have everything completed by end of April. We no longer have to worry about the various licenses being valid for six months after submission to the SDA. The medical certificates will be updated next week. I think, based on what I've heard, that we will have our I171H back in mid-April. It looks like it is all coming together.

Unfortunately, there are some possible changes coming for Ukrainian adoptions. UA is considering closing off adoptions to single parents (this breaks my heart for those that have been waiting for so long), and limiting the age spread between adopting parents and adoptees to 45 years. As it stands, it would apply to the oldest parent. We'll see what actually happens long term, and we are adapting our plan to work with the worst case scenario (not that we couldn't and wouldn't love an older child then we initially planned to adopt as much as a younger child).

More to follow.

Rita

Still doing the paperwork chase

2007-03-13T14:26:00.000-05:00

We are updating our medical tests for the medical certificate portion of the dossier. We are getting fingerprinted on March 30. Drew is updating his employment letter so that the date on it is more current. I am sending the State of Florida Criminal History form back in to be more current. Our home study agency's license isn't renewed until mid-May and expires at the end of June. I have to get a letter from the state licensing department about this as nothing can expire in less then 6 months at the time our dossier is submitted to the SDA in Ukraine. Blah, blah, on and on. But I feel I have a handle on all of this, and it will come to be in another month.

I have learned about "expedited fees" in Ukraine, and am learning about medical and psychological issues that could surface with a child we adopt. We'll also have to learn a little Russian so that we can at least communicate with our children.

We purchased a twin bed for our future child yesterday. I'll let them pick out the sheet set they want after they come home.

There isn't too much more to report on this front. We are hoping and hoping that we will not have to travel in the dead of winter, or even worse, just before everything in UA shuts down for the Christmas and New Years holidays. Rita

Time Marches Slowly

2007-01-30T21:41:00.000-05:00

I'm just waiting for Drew to get his paperwork from the health department so we can conclude the homestudy.

I'm mailing the I-600a application to USCIS (US Customs & Immigration Service). I think USCIS is now called, or at least is a part of, the Department of Homeland Security. This is basically the application to get the form we need to be able to bring a child back into this country after adopting it in Ukraine. The adoption will actually be finalized in UA in their court system.

We are doing all our paperwork in order to adopt two children. We actually prefer to adopt one child, but many people on the Yahoo message boards I read regularly end up adopting a sibling group unexpectedly. If this happened to us, and they met our age requirements, we would not say no to them.

The homestudy and waiting for this application to be processed, (we will be fingerprinted and our FBI records checks) is supposed to be the two items that take up most of the time to collect. While waiting for the USCIS application, I've been advised to work on collecting the remaining documents. We will then submit all our paperwork to a state-side helper to review for completeness and accuracy in detail. The paperwork then goes to UA to a translator/facilitator and finally submitted to the State Department of Adoption (SDA). The SDA has 20 days to review and approve (or decline) our dossier. We hope we will get an invitation to travel to UA shortly thereafter.

Just the Beginning.....

2006-12-30T18:18:00.000-05:00

This is Day One of our adoption blog. This is the very beginning of our journey, and we are just finishing the home study paperwork. Thank you friends for your wonderful reference letters.

We are using Cathy Harris and Ukrainian Angels for our adoption in Ukraine.